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upsticksFirst post of 2015! Hurraay! I've got about a million new years' resolutions this year, but write more in my LiveJournal might be one of them since it really helps me nail down my thoughts, gives me somewhere to vent my feelings and in general is a safe space to put words down. It's not a promise or anything, but it's a start.
So. Twenty fifteen is here. For the first time I worked between Christmas and New Year, which was weird, but not uncomfortable as such. It meant I didn't have any choice where I spent new year, but I had somewhere nice to go so I guess it's not all bad. (I went to Lily's party where I drank a fair amount on an empty stomach and then desperately tried to line my stomach with the mozzarella sticks I'd bought for everyone else. Oh well.)
London travel was free on 31 Dec-1 Jan until 4am so I went home and on the way started my year with some nice old fashioned street harrassment and then went to bed. I don't really remember going to bed, but I obviously did. I woke up at 2pm, and then slept some more. I finally had breakfast at 5. So starting the year as I meant to go on then.
On the 2nd, I recovered, waking up slightly earlier but still keeping to the house and not doing a great deal, then went over to Monica's, where I stayed with her until 5th.
The problem with Monica is that we get cose very very easily and then something happens and it gets kinda weird and I don't think either of us is quite sure where the line is and then I back off and she gets upset and I get confused? and then eventually we get comfortable again and it's hard trying to put some distance between us. I've known her for less than a year but we get on like a house on fire. It's a wierd relationship that way.
I say this like it's happened a lot, when really it happened once, but a BIG ONCE that time so I'm cautious of it happening again. At the time I freaked out like never before and it upset me and her and took forever for me to be OK and was the most physically confusing experience I've ever had/been. (Well, the second most physically confusing actually.)
On Wednesday I chatted with her friend - cos we get on and we both wanted something to do in the cold - and I asked him if he knew what had happened when I went all weird with her. They're pretty close so expected something at least. He didn't know, and I told him what had happened and at the moment I'm not sure that was the right thing to do but I think he can be trusted to keep a 'secret' so maybe I'm OK.
ANYWAY, he was surprised at the intensity of the Thing, and we discussed how it kind of was confusing which helped me a bit. I'm over it now, of course I am, but it dwells on my mind a bit sometimes and I'm still unsure of how I react to it now, if something similar happened again. Whiiiich... at this point is looking likely.
I remember reading in someone's LJ ages ago that they'd had a wonderful weekend with someone and then when they'd had to go home and leave it all behind, it was "coming back to Earth with a bump". I can understand that now: my year started off so lovely, it seems like it can't go anywhere but down :/
So. Twenty fifteen is here. For the first time I worked between Christmas and New Year, which was weird, but not uncomfortable as such. It meant I didn't have any choice where I spent new year, but I had somewhere nice to go so I guess it's not all bad. (I went to Lily's party where I drank a fair amount on an empty stomach and then desperately tried to line my stomach with the mozzarella sticks I'd bought for everyone else. Oh well.)
London travel was free on 31 Dec-1 Jan until 4am so I went home and on the way started my year with some nice old fashioned street harrassment and then went to bed. I don't really remember going to bed, but I obviously did. I woke up at 2pm, and then slept some more. I finally had breakfast at 5. So starting the year as I meant to go on then.
On the 2nd, I recovered, waking up slightly earlier but still keeping to the house and not doing a great deal, then went over to Monica's, where I stayed with her until 5th.
The problem with Monica is that we get cose very very easily and then something happens and it gets kinda weird and I don't think either of us is quite sure where the line is and then I back off and she gets upset and I get confused? and then eventually we get comfortable again and it's hard trying to put some distance between us. I've known her for less than a year but we get on like a house on fire. It's a wierd relationship that way.
I say this like it's happened a lot, when really it happened once, but a BIG ONCE that time so I'm cautious of it happening again. At the time I freaked out like never before and it upset me and her and took forever for me to be OK and was the most physically confusing experience I've ever had/been. (Well, the second most physically confusing actually.)
On Wednesday I chatted with her friend - cos we get on and we both wanted something to do in the cold - and I asked him if he knew what had happened when I went all weird with her. They're pretty close so expected something at least. He didn't know, and I told him what had happened and at the moment I'm not sure that was the right thing to do but I think he can be trusted to keep a 'secret' so maybe I'm OK.
ANYWAY, he was surprised at the intensity of the Thing, and we discussed how it kind of was confusing which helped me a bit. I'm over it now, of course I am, but it dwells on my mind a bit sometimes and I'm still unsure of how I react to it now, if something similar happened again. Whiiiich... at this point is looking likely.
I remember reading in someone's LJ ages ago that they'd had a wonderful weekend with someone and then when they'd had to go home and leave it all behind, it was "coming back to Earth with a bump". I can understand that now: my year started off so lovely, it seems like it can't go anywhere but down :/